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If Nobody Sees Us, Are We Still Here?

If-nobody-sees-usIt’s no secret that the young don’t see us. To them, we are invisible. We don’t turn up in magazines and newspapers, we are absent in television programs and news reports, and we are seldom featured in movies.  Life goes on around us, but we are increasingly not present in public life.  In the middle of a current political campaign in Canada, for instance, where hundreds of people line up behind the candidates as they speak, old people are seldom part of the audience, or interviewed for their opinion.

When stories about us do appear in the media, they are frequently about how seniors are going to bankrupt the health care system or how the pension system will collapse under the burden of a growing senior population. These  speculations are not based on evidence, and simply wrong, but that does not prevent them from being rolled into a prevailing  myth that there is nothing worthy about the older population, and it’s okay to ignore or disparage us.

This is not news: ageism in the media has been a reality for decades.

Dr. Linda Marie-Delhoff  quoted Dr. Heisel, a speaker at the Opera Pia International Conference for Active Aging, in an article published in the Christian Chronicle as long ago as 1987. She reports,

“Of the few elders who do appear on TV in one or another capacity, noted Heisel, almost all are male: only one in ten characters judged to be 65 or older is a woman. Thus, she said, if we assume that what has meaning and status for society finds its way onto television screens, the message conveyed seems to be that the elderly are not very important, and that among that population group, only men have significance. In referring to research of other gerontologists, Heisel also observed that when older persons do appear on-screen, they tend to be “more comical, stubborn, eccentric, and foolish than other characters.”

Twenty eight years later, it appears that the problem persists. The media, after all, largely reflects the values, attitudes, desires and fears of our society and, in North America (Canada included) we value youth, beauty, stamina and vibrant sexuality. Of the three common experiences shared by all of humanity, birth, ageing and death, birth alone is the valued experience.  Ageing brings loss of attractiveness, loss of good health, vigour and stamina—which makes many fear the ageing process. Younger people would rather not have old age evidenced in the magazines they read, the movies they see. It reminds them that they too, will have sagging skin, and lessened vitality.  Of course, the real fear is death, and irrevocably, unavoidably, ageing leads to death.  So young people, middle-aged people, even some older people, put as much distance and as many distractions as they can between themselves and ageing, the hope being, that distractions and distance will alleviate the fear of dying.

The fact that people are living longer than ever is of comfort only to the elderly, who celebrate their long lives as one of the biggest success stories in history. Benefiting from vastly improved health services and more affluence than any other generation, today’s elders are healthy and active, and see themselves as productive and valued members of society.

But this is no thanks to the media, who don’t quite know what to do with us; we are either portrayed as characters that are cranky, whiny and demanding or presented as thin, youthful, and wrinkle-free; an ideal that’s impossible to maintain later in life. The media needs to try harder to get it right; the way we elders are portrayed in powerful media images affects us on a profound level, and has real consequences for the generations coming up.

So far, there is little light shed on the problem. However, in 2012, an extensive report, The Media’s Portrayal of Ageing  C.Milner, K.Van Norman, J.Milner presented a scholarly review, concluding,

“Ultimately, if we are to manage population ageing well, we need to acknowledge the impact of the media and marketers on shaping perceptions of ageing, and strive to reform the way they view and portray people living in this multifaceted stage of life.”

So is there hope? Are attitudes changing? Perhaps. This summer, several movies featuring older characters have appeared. I’ve seen only two of them, so I can’t vouch  for their portrayal of ageing, but I view this as an improvement. Movie producers may finally be seeing the wisdom of targeting the vast population of baby boomers (think consumer market) with more positive messages about old people. So add these movies to Bridges of Madison County and Gran Torino. (Where would we be without Clint Eastwood?):

  • Ricki and the Flash
  • I’ll see you in my dreams
  • A Walk in the Woods
  • Grandma
  • Woman in Gold

Feel free to add to this list in “Comments” on this page.

10 thoughts on “If Nobody Sees Us, Are We Still Here?”

  1. What a refreshing piece of writing!

    I have been quietly (or not so quietly) disappearing from my own life as a social being. It is disturbing, after working hard all of my life, achieving an education, and some accolades, to be considered either “cute” (by my daughters), and to be invisible to almost anyone else (unless I am spending money, that seems to garner some recognition of my existence).

    I love the movie “The Company of Strangers”, which I first watched with a dear friend and his mother, who was one of the Lucky Few.

    https://www.nfb.ca/film/company_of_strangers/

    1. Thank you, Maggie, for your generous praise! I have been following your blog while putting mine together, and you have been an inspiration. Looks like you are happy in your new home!

  2. I, for one,think invisible is a glorious state of being at this point in my life.
    My granddaughters tell me I’m not cute yet though. Lol.

  3. I enjoyed your post above very much and found your site via my reading another blog namely Time Goes By.

    Fairly new to blogging although I am trying my best to become better at it as well as post more than once a week.

    Unfortunately as we all learn both early and later in life, life itself does tend to take us away from that which we enjoy doing most of all (writing, reading, line dancing, and traveling) – the last two of which my wife and I enjoy the most.

    In any case, I will stop rambling on now and just wanted to stop by and tell you how much I enjoy reading your blog.

    Thanks,
    Irwin

    1. Thank you, Irwin. It was Ronnie’s blog that inspired me to start my own. I’ll have a look at your blog. It is fun doing this, isn’t it? All the best,
      Diane

  4. I left my old barber o 40 years, and now see a young lady at a “salon.” Not because the haircut wasn’t any good, but his prices were getting too high.

    Last time I was in, I ran into another young lady. She was mixing something in a bowl and I asked her if it was her lunch. “No, she said, this is hair coloring.” She then looked me up and down, noticing my gray beard and hair. She stated that she could make me look younger, by coloring my hair. My answer was no.

    It’s kind of like, changing the spots on a Leopard. No matter what you do to him, he’s still a Leopard. Coloring my hair, isn’t going to fix the lines on my face, the age spots on my hands, nor the cane in my hands, nor the limp of bad knees, nor the reading glasses that hang over the edge of my nose. I’m still an old fart.

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