One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

It has taken me two weeks to write this blog. The first ten days were spent procrastinating and resisting every step along the way. For the past three days, although I split the task into small parts, doing one step at a time, my fingers continued to move across the keyboard as if they were pushing through molasses on a cold day. As I approach my deadline (tonight), I worry I might not finish it at all.

Throughout this entire process, I’d start something and drop it, ostensibly “for the time being”. Days later, I’d return to it, only to find that I had completely lost the thread. Unfortunately, this is not confined to writing. It is showing up in all areas of my life. Projects in the garden, around the house, and in my paperwork stagnate for days, and nothing is ever completed. This behavior is just not me—I am notoriously committed to “task completion”. So, if it’s a new thing—what is going on?

Maybe it’s a syndrome

I think it may be pandemic burnout syndrome, or at the very least, pandemic fatigue. A quick flip through Google yields the following descriptions which, understandably, are related to work situations:

From WHO:

Burn-out is a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It is characterized by three dimensions: feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion; increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job; and reduced professional efficacy.

From Facty Health:

Burnout syndrome is a prolonged state of physical and mental exhaustion, usually due to long-term exposure to a high-pressure atmosphere. The term is becoming increasingly common, with some studies reporting close to 30% of American workers suffer from burnout.

It’s not surprising though, that this pandemic merits its own description:

 “Pandemic fatigue” can occur when people get tired of the pandemic measures and become less likely to follow public health practices or simply begin to drown out those messages. A natural sense of burnout can happen since we’ve had to stick to these public health measures for such a prolonged period. Pandemic fatigue can be experienced differently for everyone but often presents itself as feeling restless, irritable, lacking motivation, and difficulty concentrating on tasks. You may even notice yourself withdrawing from socializing with others or physical symptoms such as changes in eating and sleep habits.”

Maybe we all experience it like this

An article by Dr. Jennifer Sullivan, (Chronicle Journal, June 9, 2020) offers a more personal perspective:

“If you are feeling sick and tired of socially distancing, you are not alone. After being cooped up at home for several months now, it’s no wonder many of us are experiencing ‘cabin fever,’ or what health experts are referring to as “quarantine fatigue.” Though not an official diagnosis, quarantine fatigue involves symptoms such as restlessness, irritability, fatigue, lack of motivation, and difficulty concentrating. However, each of us will experience quarantine fatigue in a different way.

Quarantine fatigue occurs when factors associated with the pandemic and prolonged physical distancing begin to take their toll on us. Over time, we become worn down by stress, loneliness, lack of stimulation, boredom, and the inability to access our regular support systems. We crave social contact, and long for the freedom we had pre-COVID-19.”

You hit the nail, Dr. Sullivan, I mutter to myself as I try to finish up. I’m tempted to do a quick ‘wrap-up’ and leave it at that, but not without leaving you with a few terrible jokes, shamelessly lifted from the internet:

• Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings. One of them says to the other, “Mine are so good at social distancing, they won’t even call me.”

• The World Health Organization announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.

• After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my house but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasn’t the reason.

• Yeah, I have plans tonight. I’ll probably hit the living room around 8 or 9.

• If there’s a baby boom nine months from now, what will happen in 2033? There’ll be a whole bunch of quaranteens.

• I never thought the comment “I wouldn’t touch them with a six-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are.

• Finland just closed its borders. You know what that means. No one will be crossing the finish line.

• The only types of jokes allowed during a quarantine.  Inside jokes.

I hope you will forgive the above attempt at humor, and acknowledge it as a passing affliction, never to be repeated!