How the Gift of Boredom Can Rock Your Retirement!

It seems that we prefer almost any activity over the risk of being bored. It’s human nature to want to avoid that feeling of nothingness. Fortunately (or unfortunately), technology has provided us with an array of choices, Netflix, texting, playing computer games, watching television—all designed to fill those mental spaces that would otherwise be given to abstract, unfocused mental activity. But for retired older people, there may be an upside to boredom—a silver lining, which could point the way to a more meaningful life.

Retired older adults are especially vulnerable to fears of being bored. Despite our best efforts, we are ever aware that we could be knocked aside by boredom, once we no longer have the structure of work. It can immobilize us, take us over, it can have us on the couch doing nothing for days at a time.

Boredom, is sometimes defined as “the state of being weary and restless through lack of interest”.  Clinically, a full-blown episode is described as a feeling of general unhappiness, a loss of interest or enjoyment in activities, lethargy and lack of motivation. Accompanied also by feelings of worthlessness, and an inability to concentrate or make decisions, boredom has very little to recommend it. Among older people, who have led interesting and involved lives, retirement brings the possibility of those feelings ever closer. At its worst, boredom can lead to feelings that life is no longer worth living, and ultimately, thoughts of suicide.

When the usual strategies don’t help

No retired person wants to admit to feeling bored. There is an element of sheepishness, even shame, if having spent years dreaming of being free from work, and planning for financial freedom, you finally retire, only to discover that you don’t know what to do with your time!

While young people often mope around and complain about boredom, their lives, so full of possibility, can change on a dime, and suddenly become full of purpose. That is not available for older people, who may believe that their most productive years are behind them.

But you are not alone—many older people struggle with lack of purpose and boredom after they have retired— it’s more common than you think. We are led to believe that our retirement years are supposed to be a time of well-deserved rest and relaxation after decades of being in the workforce. Movies, advertising, and current thinking hold us to a very high standard of satisfaction in retirement. However, like many other retirees, you may find that retirement isn’t what you hoped it would be. Somehow all of the strategies you have developed, switching activities, joining groups, even daydreaming, haven’t helped you find purpose and happiness.

Open up to boredom, and open up your life!

But psychologists and researchers have been homing in on boredom, and suggest that experiencing it may be just what you need. It can be the gateway to creativity and finding a new purpose in life.

In an article he wrote for Psychology Today in 2018, Shahram Heshmat expands on that idea:

“Boredom also has its benefits. It is important to see boredom as a “call to action” (Svendsen, 1999). Nietzsche suggested that men of rare sensibility value boredom as an impetus to achievement. Boredom can be a catalyst for action. It can provide an opportunity for thought and reflection.”

This is not how we usually think about being bored, or how we handle it. Usually we reach for something that will distract us from it, or fill us in some way. This is why snacking when bored can be a big problem for some, resulting in unwanted weight gain. It is why, as well, a service such as Netflix is so popular, allowing people to binge on endless reruns of favorite programs.

In fact, one of the most counterproductive and dangerous things you can do when you find yourself bored, is to consume something, or spend time on mindless media activities. Such distractions lead to food, alcohol and gambling addictions, which only bring us down.

What we need to do, instead, is to step out of our self-centered desires, in other words,  step outside of ourselves. We need to allow ourselves to experience boredom in its fullest, and feel the actual despair and futility of our lives. These moments of discomfort are a sign for us to take action, and acting on our boredom could really be the start of greater creativity, fulfillment and overall joy in our lives.

Finding the silver lining in boredom

Misha, a Japan-based blogger and author, explores these ideas in an article for Medium, The Rise of Boredom: How our Stone-Age Brains Fail in Our Space-Age World, saying:

“When we’re able escape the shackles of boredom, the world opens up to us. We can dedicate ourselves to a greater mission, or another person, or an activity that we find deeply fulfilling, and we can step out of our own self-centered desires. And in doing so, we might find that perhaps — like our ancestors certainly experienced — it doesn’t take that much to live a happy, not-so boring life.”

But by far, the most interesting thoughts on the negative and positive aspects of boredom come from the work of John Eastwood, a York University researcher, interviewed by Aaron Hutchins for a Jan 31, 2016 article in Maclean’s magazine, who says:

“Boredom can be a cue that, if we listen to it and respond appropriately, can help us experience a more meaningful life. Think of it as a signal and ally toward a more fulfilling life, rather than a problem to obliterate.”

Boredom is an endlessly fascinating subject to him. He says, tongue in cheek,

“I’ve never felt bored of boredom.”

I feel the same way—I’ve been interested in the topic of boredom for years, having observed people I know who have been baffled when it suddenly appears in their retired lives. I wrote an article about it four years ago for Sixty and Me, when I first started this blog, and can see now, how I’ve changed my perspective!