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Are Millennials Questioning The Wisdom of Older People?

wisdom“In youth we learn, in age we understand”.

Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach wrote these words when she was seventy-five years old. It’s my favourite explanation of wisdom. I’ve gone so far as to print it out on a little card and mount it above my desk, just as a reminder that wisdom, as a by-product of age, has value.

I need to be reminded about that these days, when attitudes about us, the older generation, is eroding, and our place in the world is being questioned.

In the past, when I’ve been frustrated or overwhelmed, it helped to read the quote, and have my spirits buoyed by the idea that, now that I’m older, I have the advantage of being wiser, too.

It helped me get back to my centre, where I feel strongest and sure of my values. This “knowing” comes out the experiences I’ve had—when you are my age, you have weathered a myriad of events that have tested you—loss, heartache and pain, as well as the love, joy and happiness that comes with life. If you are fortunate, you have come out of it with an inner strength that guides you and allows you to stand apart and view things in your own way.

This strength is the foundation of wisdom—and you find yourself accessing it again and again. It gives you the assurance that you have paid your dues, and become an “expert” in living. I would like to think that this view helps you sail through new challenges in your life, and that you can now put trouble and worry into perspective. And I’d like to think that you value your wisdom and draw  on it consciously to enrich your own life and help others.

But lately, I’ve been re-evaluating these ideas about wisdom, and seeing another side to it. Even though we are older and should be wise, we are susceptible to forces that eat away at our well-being and make us small, chipping away at our ability to demonstrate our wisdom.

The events of the past few weeks and months have changed my outlook on the wisdom of older people. I have watched and read about the Brexit referendum in England as it unfolded, and followed the primaries and the pre-election hype in the US. I studied the reports and charts about how older people voted. I can’t help but be dismayed when I read about the nostalgia vote, and the lack of wisdom and concern for future generations reflected in this trend.

A few months ago, I wrote more expansively about the wisdom of our generation, how it gives us valuable perspective, how it can help the people we love, and how we can collectively use our wisdom on the world stage. But I don’t think now is the time to illuminate these ideas. Things are too raw, and we are all too cynical. Anything I say about our generation right now, how wise and self-possessed we are, may be seen as hollow and untrue.

But I’m also optimistic. Even though we are seen as less influential now than the younger generations, we are not, as our critics say, small and insignificant—we can still be powerful on the world stage. We still have the ability to look at life from an elevated vantage point. That is the root of wisdom, and that is what is needed in the world today.

This election season has left wounds. We’ve been stung, denounced, criticized. We feel the eyes of the younger generations on us, and they are not kind. Remember the days when we were spoken to with respect, when we were asked for our advice, when even the simple gesture of offering us a seat was commonplace? For the most part, we’ve lost those things, and we may be on the way to losing more. But given time, I’m sure that, as a generation, we will regain that love and respect. Younger people loved us in the past, and will love us again. After all, we are their grandmothers, their grandfathers, their great aunts and uncles.

This election year of bitterness and anger will roll over, and in time the wounds will heal. So, at this point, while I’m no longer subscribing to Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach’s view of wisdom, I’m just hoping that history will prove Evan Esar wrong:

The disadvantage of becoming wise is that you realize how foolish you have been. —Evan Esar

38 thoughts on “Are Millennials Questioning The Wisdom of Older People?”

  1. Great thought provoking on wisdom, thanks Diane. I think that blame is like a pileup on the freeway- every generations had to deal with an others mess, we had whales, pollution, missiles, AIDS, equal rights for us women, the younglings I work with are not taught history anymore.( My 35 year old co-worker had never heard of Hiroshima) They have no idea how hard the British fought for their homeland, a toughness I experienced there, passed down as lore and wisdom must be.Love your writing- Thank you.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      You may have noticed that I am mostly non-political in my blog. But I really wanted to address how attitudes towards our old people are changing, and not for the best! The voting patterns of old people this summer disappointed me. I’m afraid what the outcome of the November elections in the US will be. Trying not to let it obsess me!

  2. Diane,
    I can feel your pain and despair in this post. It is a difficult time for the English-speaking world as we grapple with the inheritance of the past, when our ancestors were not very respectful of people who were nonwhite and did not speak English. We are reaping the harvest that they sowed. There’s a lot of anger and resentment and ignorance. We can’t solve these large problems in one generation, but we can certainly get started. Our own generation is one of the ones most at fault, and must look in the mirror and change our ways.

    We also have to keep hope alive. “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”

    Rin

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      What to do about the anger, resentment and ignorance of our generation—that is the problem! Any analysis of the financial problems of younger people should make us more aware of their problems. Time for that to come out in the news, and more positive solutions be brought forward!

  3. Dianne, A lot in the post to reflect upon. I had hoped that the things I marched for and believed in would just become the norm by the time I reached the age of a wizened, old woman. Alas, not all those things have become the norm but an enormous amount of social change (and most of it for the better) has occurred during our lifetime. My prayer is that our generations will not be overcome with fear but will keep leading the way to the complete fulfillment of our democratic principles. It happened before and can happen again. Power to the Grandmother’s maybe should be the new slogan.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      I might sound pessimistic in my article, but I am always, always optimistic! The social map is quite scrambled right now, with racial and generational strife every where you turn. I do believe that Grandmothers will show the way. And I do believe they (we) are wise—digging deep and thinking about future generations is so needed right now.

  4. I feel that the younger generation doesn’t appreciate what we went through to give them the rights they now take for granted. My children think of me as unable to have a valuable insight or piece of wisdom. They know it all! My grandchildren are my greatest hope. And they love me dearly as I do them

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      It’s hard for one generation to totally understand another. I remember being quite unsympathetic to the people who went through the Depression – my mother’s generation. It affected some more than others, and I recall a neighbor saying she saved every piece of string, used up every scrap of food. She was always afraid it would happen again. I was a teenager, in that golden time of the 1950s, when we all had jobs, so I thought of her as crazy. And yes, Betsy, I look upon our grandchildren as our greatest hope, and the greatest hope of the planet as well!

  5. I have for a long while looked at my Boomer peer group and wondered what the hell happened. We used to be so idealistic and non-judgmental. We were anti-war, for Pete’s sake! And then we grew up and became fat and smug and advocated for war and against food stamps, and in every way turned into the old folks against whom we rebelled. Peace and love, respect for mother Earth, where did it all go? At 62, I am ashamed.

  6. Still the Lucky Few

    Lynne, I’m sooooo careful in talking about the Boomers—after all, I’m not one of you, but am certainly close enough to identify with your group. My own demographic group (The Silents, The Lucky Few) was so small (lowest birthrate for 1900s) that I don’t think we made much of an impact, although demographers say we were the first to treasure our children, the first to want them to have it better than we did. What happened? Taken as a group, your peer group had more of everything, including security and benefits. It’s almost like they are saying, “We’ve got it, we are going to keep it, and who cares about the kids coming up? It’s a new dialogue that is slowly opening up. Thanks for adding to it!

  7. It’s been a summer of sadness in terms of world events. I take solace by trying to live my life peacefully and respectfully. I practise kindness and generosity with those I encounter in my daily affairs, and, I try to keep the hope I felt as a young woman in the 60s alive in my heart.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Truly, that’s all we can do, but it is important, and the energy from our good intentions spreads to others. Yes, it’s been a nasty summer! Stay well.

  8. I do believe that true elders are wise. But I also believe that only a small proportion of old people are true elders. My definition of an elder is someone who has not only reached maturity but has also maintained an interest in—and deep involvement with—the affairs of the world and who is able to practise what I call ‘big picture thinking.’

    For example my favourite blogger, John Michael Greer, who is by no means an old man yet, thinks and behaves like an elder. He is able to comment on current affairs in a way that links them to the great arc of human history and to the trends and patterns that have repeated down the centuries, e.g. the rise and fall of civilizations and the typical shape and sequence of revolutions. He is aware that the recent events on both sides of the Pond are following a predictable pattern, revealing as they do a very understandable—and justified— yearning by the economic ‘underclass’ to rebel against the status quo. Given the shocking inequalities of today, with a vast proportion of the wealth concentrated in the hands of fewer than one percent of the population, it is hardly surprising. Since they yearn for revolution, it is as though any kind will do! And it is this yearning to rebel that makes them such easy prey for the false prophets (Trump on your side, UKIP on ours) who appear to offer them a vehicle for their rebellion.

    The old people swayed by this rhetoric are not thinking for themselves. They are not studying the situation carefully and using their wisdom to evaluate it. They are not being elders. They are simply being old people who have not learned to study the big picture. Elder-type thinking is broad and inclusive and forward-looking and informed by a lifetime of self-reflective experience. Old-people thinking is backward looking, clinging to old certainties and all-too easily influenced by whatever is on TV.

    I guess we cannot all be elders. But we can all aspire to it. Achieving true elderhood is, I believe, the primary task of our ‘third age.’

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Your comment gave me chills! It is so ‘right on’! Being a true elder requires that we are enlightened, not only through education, through being immersed in the events of the day, but also through spiritual awareness. It is the work of a lifetime and, as you say, our primary task as we come into our third age. What is disappointing about the Boomer generation is that no group of people has ever had so much education, so many freedoms and so many material advantages. So, one can surmise, I guess, that those are not the elements that make a wise person. Thank you for sharing your true wisdom, Marian!

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      I agree, Ann. It’s so hard to stay positive right now! But I guess the only way to change this is to vote from a knowledgeable position next time.

  9. This is something I think about a lot. The feeling of becoming irrelevant as we get older.
    Thanks for writing about it, hopefully I will have the wisdom to not care!

  10. I’m afraid I love the Esar quote. Mine is, “We’re all a bunch of nuts.” I’m not as impressed by human intelligence/wisdom as you are. I think the world/universe is too complicated for our little minds to fully comprehend, so we muddle along the best we can.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Those were my thoughts when we saw the Imax presentation, “A Beautiful Planet”. The images of our little planet making it’s way in that incredible galaxy made me realize that we really don’t have the capacity to grasp the enormity of it! But kudos for us for trying!

  11. I’m not sure that either knowledge or wisdom can be attributed to age groups. The generalisations inherent in that aren’t, in my view, particularly helpful. Yes, we can acquire more knowledge as we grow older, but does that necessarily make us any better qualified to turn it by some process of alchemy into wisdom? In some cases, maybe it does, but you only have to look at the behaviour of many politicians – who are often of an older generation – to realise that wisdom and age aren’t always natural partners! The wisest words I have heard recently were in a viral video I watched yesterday of a 6 year old telling her parents what she hoped they would be like after their divorce. I wish I was as wise now, at 62, as she already is!

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      I don’t know what influences some people to grow wiser, and some people to just grow older. A mix of genetics and experiences, perhaps. But I do enjoy looking at a generation and coming to some conclusions about the group as a whole. The Boomers are the beneficiaries of more wealth and privilege than any previous generation. I find it interesting to learn what they did with their legacy.

    2. I’m just the opposite, Diane. I feel uncomfortable with generalizations, lumping people together and assuming they’re all the same. Have you ever seen the HBO series, The Wire? It was about the police and drug dealers in Baltimore and David Simons, the author, did a great job having sympathetic people on both sides. No black and white in describing the problems, even though racism was part of the scene. Simons is only 56 and he looks deeply rather than sitting on an elevated perch.

      1. Still the Lucky Few

        We need more people like Simons in the conversation! But no, I haven’t seen ‘The Wire’. Thanks for your observations.

  12. I think every generation questions the knowledge of the preceding one. I know mine did. I think it’s a natural process of maturation.
    As for the damage done by election campaigns, be glad you’re not south of the border. Pray for us!

  13. as I read all the comments (sorry late checking your post) I have become confused – are the older generations better or just so-so – or is it that the younger generations coming through will have enough bodies to be as “wisdom-minded” or not. I suppose that will depend on what the world has in store for them and to some extent us. (I’m in the Southern Hemisphere, so not particularly up with the nuances of the North)

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Hi Cathy and Marian. Thanks Marian for your excellent response to Cathy.Materialism is the trap that has harmed us all, and there never was a more materialist or wealthy generation than the Boomers—so much has already been said about how they willingly allowed corporations to destroy so much of the environment. I think, in discussing wisdom, I was eluding o the recent voting patterns of that same generation, and how they still don’t accept that who they vote for makes a difference to the generations that follow.

  14. Cathy, I really believe – and hope – that the young people growing up in this more globally-conscious, globally-connected world, will not only be a lot more knowledgeable but also a lot wiser than us at a much earlier age. But then, I always was an optimist. And a lot depends on whether they can resist the traps and snares of materialism which, in this capitalist culture, are so hard to avoid.

  15. Thank you for this thought-provoking post and for the flood of equally thoughtful comments it spawned. I learned, felt myself open to new thoughts, as I read them both; and that is not a daily occurrence in my life. I, too, take solace in my grandchildren who seem more accepting of differences than did their parents or those of my generation.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Thanks, Aunt Beulah. It does seem that today’s young people are more in tune with diversity, more tolerant. That is a natural outcome, perhaps, from having so much contact with differing racial and life-style groups. Social media, of course, is also helpful. So, while there is better understanding and tolerance among people, there is also the real threat of terrorism, which, of course is based on hatred. I am, at this moment, watching the news about the truck attack in Nice, and am so very saddened by it.

  16. Yeahanotherblogger

    I usually don’t read the comments that other readers have posted. But I did this time. Your essay prompted many people to respond. I’m especially taken by Marian’s thoughts. She is very insightful.
    I think that being wise equates with being open-minded and respectful of others. Those qualities are not exclusive to any age group.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      You are right—they’re not. A wealth of life experience , however, should mean something. I believe that we are meant to grow and evolve as we become older. Some would say that is the purpose of our lives. The large numbers that voted for Brexit in England, and the millions of older people who subscribe to a damaging political movement in the US, are disappointing. I would say they are shortsighted—anything but wise.

  17. Certainly there’s food for thought in all you’ve written, and I concur with a lot of your observations, but doesn’t every young generation — or at least some of their number — question, often reject, earlier generations judgement? They have the benefit of hindsight as do we, but whether or not they learn from history is another matter since so many don’t want to be bothered spending time examining the past. I would think true wisdom would come from not only understanding but also recognizing when we’ve been foolish. I would think wisdom is disadvantaged if foolishness isn’t recognized.

    1. Still the Lucky Few

      Thanks, Joared. And didn’t the baby boomers question everything about their elders? So true! Yet they didn’t carry their concerns forward. Instead, they bought into a movement of materialism that is currently threatening our well being as humans. I know its not fair to generalize, and I hate doing it, but numbers don’t lie, and the numbers of older people who voted in Brexit and the US primaries out of self interest are huge. This is well documented, and will affect our reputation for awhile.

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