There are two ways to handle becoming older:
- accept it, and decide to live a diminished life,
- accept it but stay as involved and competent as possible.
You might be tempted to think, “I’ve worked hard all my life, why shouldn’t I take it easy and rest on my laurels now?”
Or you could challenge yourself, build up your thinking and living skills so that you can stay in the game feeling competent and in charge. Be aware, though, that it will take a lot of effort. Many people are not up for it. Are you?
Should you decide to remain on course, here are some tangible ways you can push the boundaries of what you can achieve as an older individual, how you can grow and learn. And most importantly, how you can stay focused and capable:
- Start a book club, reading books you don’t usually read.
- Take a fitness class.
- Start writing a daily journal.
- Learn a new language.
- Take up a new hobby, something you never considered doing before.
- Start conversations with people you don’t know.
- Learn to speak in a clear, confident voice.
- Take a leading position in the community, on a school board or town council.
- Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
- Drink more water, instead of tea and coffee.
- Wake up earlier in the morning.
- Give back to your community, volunteer your time, donate money.
- Get rid of clutter in your home.
Or you could be even more proactive and sponsor or give a TED talk.
A TED talk is a recorded public-speaking presentation that was originally given at the main TED (technology, entertainment and design) annual event or one of its many satellite events around the world.
To help you stay on track, keep the following sayings in mind:
Be a positive force with everyone you know and meet.
Learn something new every day.
Be more organized.
Look for the good in every situation.
Disconnect from social media for a day.
When we challenge ourselves, we expand our comfort zone and force ourselves to learn new things.
It’s a process that’s scary but exciting. It opens up possibility for growth, sets the tone for the day and makes it possible to take new risks. It pushes you to be adventurous—you won’t be sorry! You would gain confidence, resilience, and motivation. You might find opportunities and new goals to chase, maybe do something extraordinary. And you’ll have the satisfaction of having done it all yourself.
Don’t forget to practice self-care during this process. It’s not a question of being selfish or self-indulgent. It simply means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy and well, so you can help and care for others, and do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day.
Most importantly, be mindful.
Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of our thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations, through a gentle, nurturing lens.
Mindfulness also involves acceptance, meaning that we don’t judge our thoughts and feelings as we experience them. We are conscious that there is no “right” or “wrong” way to think or feel in a given moment. When we practice mindfulness, our thoughts tune into what we’re sensing in the present moment rather than rehashing the past or imagining the future.
Here are some parting thoughts:
Narrow your expertise…
Constantly ask for feedback…
Set lofty goals…
Choose the road less traveled…
Never, ever stop learning…
My overall goal is to live to be 110. I think that is ambitious enough in this ever changing world. My surgeon laughs when I tell my ambition, but I am sure he is on board. Right now we grow our garden, mill our flour, bake our bread, cook from scratch, maintain our dwelling… life is good, and I hope to continue with this lifestyle until the minute “my time” is up, and I join my beloved elders.
Maggie, you have always inspired me. Growing your own vegetables, baking your bread, not to mention milling your flour is a rarity and quite remarkable! Many people aspire to live as you do, but the work is so daunting, that hardly anyone achieves it! I know you will keep it up for as long as you possibly can.
I like your ideas for staying focused and capable, but I think it’s important to start doing these things early in life. No use trying to learn a new language at 95 (unless you want to). I feel sorry for elderly people who have NO hobbies or interests other than watching TV. There is so much we can do that will make us feel good and keep our brain and body alive, but we need to start early.
Fortunately, widening your reading range, taking a fitness class, writing a daily journal, starting conversations with people, and many more are fairly easy to implement. I agree that they become harder as we age. I like your point that there is a lot older people can do to generate feeling good and keep brains and body fit and able. Starting early is admirable, but the door to learning new things and keeping our bodies fit is never closed. It is never too late. Thank you for your thoughts, Anneli!
A friend of mine took up the violin at 80. It was a bit painful – for us – not her – LOL – but you had to admire that spirit!
Kudos to her for taking up a challenge like that! Occurs to me though that she might have started with an easier instrument—a guitar perhaps?
Learning and growing has always been part of my comfort zone. At my age I don’t have to look for challenges, they come to me. All I have to do is handle them well and keep improving my life skills. And write my daily post. I’ve been doing that for 9 1/2 years now. 😊
Cheerful M. At times, I feel that I don’t have enough challenges. As I grow older, all of the issues I worried about when I was younger have been addressed. But they are different now. I have less energy and motivation. I guess you can say that is a challenge in itself! And, of course, I don’t accomplish as much. Diane and Still the Lucky Few
I feel so lucky to be a writer. It’s a hard thing to do! As I prepare myself for today’s editing process, I have to remember what I read in the previous 50+ pages to ensure that today’s are consistent and follow logically. And then tomorrow, from page 100 – 150 +/-. It’s pretty challenging! But I love it. I also love your bulleted list at the top of this post.
Lynne, I agree that editing is a tough thing to do. My memory and capability to line the passages up and have them make sense lapses at times. That’s when I get frustrated with myself! It’s clear that you love writing, and it shows in your work!
Cheerful M. At times, I feel that I don’t have enough challenges. As I grow older, all of the issues I worried about when I was younger have been addressed. But they are different now. I have less energy and motivation. I guess you can say that is a challenge in itself! And, of course, I don’t accomplish as much.
My apologies, everyone! Please disregard this duplication (above) of my reply to Cheerful M LOL.
Love this post, thank you. I’ll be 78 this week and still writing…something I took up when I retired from my corporate job. I have two new books coming out and a 3rd one underway. The difference now is that I’m writing for the pleasure of it and I’m not attached to the outcome, as I used to be. I now accept that I have slowed down my pace out of necessity…which was the most difficult thing to do. Writing about it also helps.
I had to chuckle about your comment about slowing down. It doesn’t sound as if you have slowed down a bit! Congratulations on your vigorous book publishing career! Very impressive! How are you advertising those books? I’d like to follow up on that.
Just google my name for children’s books already published. My memoir (pub date tba) will be my first adult book and my 8th children’s book will be out next year.
Thanks, Pat. I’ll look those up. I’m looking forward to your memoir—it will very interesting to all of your fellow writers, especially to me!
Hi, Diane – That was a great checklist. Here’s where I am at:
Start a book club, reading books you don’t usually read. º I’m currently in five.
Take a fitness class. º I work out daily on my own and 2x a week with friends.
Start writing a daily journal. º Sadly, I fail at this. But I do blog 3 x per month (except this April).
Learn a new language. I speak some Mandarin, some French and some Italian (but I need to refresh all 3)
Take up a new hobby, something you never considered doing before. I recently enrolled in 3 local Elder College Courses (diverse, interesting and challenging).
Start conversations with people you don’t know. What else can we do when in line for groceries?
Learn to speak in a clear, confident voice. I try.
Take a leading position in the community, on a school board or town council. Never!
Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Regularly.
Drink more water, instead of tea and coffee. I try.
Wake up earlier in the morning. Regularly.
Give back to your community, volunteer your time, donate money. I volunteer at our local animal shelter.
Get rid of clutter in your home. This is an ongoing battle. The struggle is treal!
Thank you for providing this prompt for reflection.
RR, I admit I got a bit exhausted just reading your list! I was especially interested in your approach to learning new languages. You are an inspiration!
Hello Diane loved your blog, I am so proud to say I am doing 10 of your recommendations Thank you for your invite to the Book Club That one dissolved but I joined another one
Sure do miss you!
Ex neighbour Brenda
Hi Brenda, I just found your comment (as anonymous). I don’t know why names don’t always show up. Anyway, lovely to hear from you! I miss you too!
Most of my life has been in the fibercraft world until I’d had enough of that – aspects needed a rest. And I have “rested” until I joined U3A (Titirangi branch) and I started to be involved with their additional activities – first it was just one activity – now it’s 4. And then I added another more regular “game” type group that has nothing to do with U3A. It’s been fun to be involved with things that have nothing to do with the “fiber crafting”
But I still have fiber, paper and such like materials to make things if I wish…and of course playing around with my art endeavours.
I’m not clear about some of your terminology, for example, fiber crafting. Sounds interesting, but I have no idea how you use it. And what is U3A? I’d like to know more…Thanks, Cedar.
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