3 Reasons to End Disparaging Humor About Old People

In our culture, at long last, we have made headway in ending disparaging humor about many marginalized groups—other races, other religions, the opposite gender, sexual preferences, trans gender. and disabilities. Yet we persist in making derogatory remarks about the group we will all become—old people. We cannot, or will not, acknowledge that jokes about older people are ageist and discriminatory.

I know it takes decades, and much effort to change entrenched attitudes. Yet people have been working on this issue for years. In February, 2013, for instance, Kaven Peterson, editor of Changing Aging.org, an organization devoted to changing ageist attitudes, said this:

“What matters is that ageism is a very real and damaging problem in our culture. Older people are discriminated against, exploited, abused and neglected on a scale that dwarfs almost any other group. And humor that mocks old people and perpetuates negative stereotypes purely for the sake of a laugh has the effect of legitimizing and normalizing ageist behavior and discrimination. “

Not much has changed, since then. In fact, ageism seems more tenacious than ever. It’s still okay, for instance, to condescend to old people by calling them “dear” and “hon”. It’s still okay to have parties resembling ‘roasts’ in which people make fun of a ‘guest of honour’ who has reached a landmark age, usually 50. And it’s still okay to laugh at jokes by stand up comedians who direct their humor at old people. Late-night TV hosts especially, appear to be venomous in pointing out how terrible it is to be old.

1. Jokes directed at a person or a group, erode self-esteem

I’m happy and relieved that other groups have made headway in their battle to end discrimination, but I’m reminded every day that old people are still there, at the centre of comedy, the butt of jokes, continuously affronted by derogatory humor.

Maybe it stings more because we olders are being disparaged by younger people, many of whom have decades to go before they reach our years. It would be shocking and unacceptable, for instance, for a white person to make disparaging comments about black people. Yet a member of the black community, Chris Rock, is well-known for his subversive disparaging humor he uses to challenge racial inequality in the United States. People may gasp in horror at what he says, but he is excused, because he also is black, so the humor is largely accepted as self-depracatory.

Old age jokes are the last bastion of bad taste in our humor culture—comedians, who are older join in this also, and seem to be saying, “Look at me, I’m just like you—I’m geting old too. We are all in the same boat, so it’s okay.” That makes it not so shocking, although still offensive, when a comedian like Billy Crystal jokes about his own infirmaries as he ages.

Women used to laugh at sexist jokes a few decades ago. We adopted a form of shamed guffawing, shrugging off the barely disguised hostility. But we hated being the object of off-color jokes—and they bothered us enough to cause a revolt. Be assured that, although older people try to laugh and shrug them off, jokes against them leave their mark.

2. Disparagement humor fosters discrimination

In a September 8, 2016 article in “The Conversation”, Thomas E. Ford says,

“By disguising expressions of prejudice in a cloak of fun and frivolity, disparagement humor … appears harmless and trivial. However, a large and growing body of psychology research suggests just the opposite – that disparagement humor can foster discrimination against targeted groups.”

I’m convinced that this was the case when the Archie Bunker show aired during the 1970s. Whereas the majority of viewers accepted Archie’s invective against minorities as satire, and laughed at the absurdity of it, others saw it as giving permission to join in racist attitudes. To many, it seemed to convey an underlying truth that black people were inferior, a dangerous, intolerant attitude which still survives to some extent today.

3. Jokes about old people makes younger people dread aging

And so it is with old people. By normalizing behaviors that ridicule being old, our culture makes it harder, and certainly less attractive to be old. It doesn’t give us any credit for being more than just old, credit for our abilities, our contributions, our wisdom. We are not viewed as individuals—only as a group that is weak and infirm.

It’s not surprising, then that many younger people will do anything, spend millions on anti-aging treatments, spend hours a week on shaping their bodies, wear clothing that is uncomfortable, just to avoid looking like one of us. They’d do anything, it seems, to avoid being a punchline in the humor that disparages and marginalizes us!

Some of you will say that I’m over reacting, that it works for you to just ignore it, that you couldn’t care less. But that’s not how change happens. Issues like ageisn need to be held up to the light and scrutinized. We don’t yet know the shape of it, or how long it will take, but ageism—and that includes disparaging humor against old people—has become a trending issue, and it isn’t going away.