There’s an empty feeling inside me these days. It’s not hard to figure it out—we’re all feeling it as our new reality sets in. I’m busy every day doing things like wiping down door handles, finding new ways to buy food, and staying in touch with everyone I love. But being busy doesn’t fill the void. It’s people I miss, their friendliness, their activity, their being there. I miss my everyday life.
I’ve lived in this condo complex for fourteen years. I know almost everyone here—they’ve become part of the fabric of my being, the street, the building, the harbor full of movement and life. It’s frightening how fast it all shut down. Suddenly, the streets were empty, the harbor still. And it’s shocking how fast the shops were emptied and how quickly everyone disappeared. Of course, I know it had to happen. We call it ‘social distancing,’ and we do it to save ourselves.
Inside, behind closed doors, our computers are active, our televisions incessantly on. We worry. We don’t know how long this will last—and when it will end. Like many others, I’m sure; I hope that people will be patient, and governments will display an abundance of caution before allowing commerce and human activity to resume.
Yet within all of this, there is hope, and a glimpse into the beauty of humanity. This morning, the Times Colonist (our local paper) carried an article about how grateful people are, and how they are demonstrating their thanks to the police, the nurses, the grocers, and others, who are keeping their community going. Handmade signs are appearing where these people can see them and know that those they serve are thankful.
As you can see, my blog has changed. Steve Switzer of Quadra Street Designs is responsible for the new look. We have tried to make it cleaner and easier to navigate. Buttons on top of the masthead scene indicate the five categories, and the information on the left is clearer and less cluttered. I hope you enjoy it.
Practice being together apart, stay well, and please continue logging in!
A Safe Harbor is a state of mind; it’s the place or metaphor to which one goes in times of worry. It can be friendship, marriage, church, garden, beach, poem, prayer, or song. Luanne Rice.
I share the complexity of your feelings, Diane. Content to putter around for much of the day–the days even pass more quickly than I would have imagined–and to connect with family and friends–virtually–but melancholy at time, too. Aware that the days and years are passing quickly. To the extent that my life was governed by a sense of future–that is dissipating. I damn well better get better and better living well in an eternal present.
True, Barry! I’m more inclined to be grateful these days—waking up each morning, with a prayer of thanks just for not being ill, and alive. Take good care. Stay well.
I like the new look very much, although I realize now how much I am NOT enjoying change but looking for familiarity and comfort. The world these days is scary.
My timing was off, in releasing this new look right now. Thanks, Djan for observing that! I’ve been working on this for some time, and it was time to take the plunge. Hope you stay well, good to hear from you!
I like the new look, kind of, but I liked the old look also. The new look is cleaner, but is almost antiseptic! LOL. Nevertheless, change is good.
We are all coping as best we can with this sudden change to almost everything we have had that is familiar. It will take a while. Thanks for your thoughts! It’s important to keep in touch as we navigate the strange emptiness of this time.
Well, it IS cleaner looking! Yeah, a bit antiseptic right now, but I intend to change the masthead picture regularly, and add other things as I go along. Today’s feature picture is missing from the front page—don’t ask me why! I’m texting my designer soon about it. “Strange emptiness” is a good way to put it. Thanks, Rin. Stay well.
Thanks Diane, you certainly nailed it, the feelings that everyone is experiencing. I sometimes find the quietness of the harbour and streets very eerie, and feel as though I am in some kind of twilight zone. You and Bob keep safe and healthy ,always a pleasure to run into you,
There are very few houses around us. One is a pub and closed down, one a care home. Two of the other three have offered help should we need it.
Good to know, Derrick. Stay well!
Lockdown is tough on everyone, but I imagine being closed into a condo unit may be a little more stressful than spending the time in a separate house with a yard. At least on my street, people are going out to walk dogs (keeping the required distance, of course), and cars still go by. So, I basically just feel like I’m on an extended, enforced staycation. I can even converse with my good neighbors over the fence, so long as we both stay well back. My mother-in-law, however, is in a senior high-rise and is basically shut into her own little apartment – residents are not even allowed to congregate in the building’s lobby. She’s going stir-crazy. Despite all the precautions, we just learned there is a COVID case right in her building – hopefully not on the same floor as her.
That’s frightening news about your mother. My elderly sister is in a similar situation, and she is scared. I’m not really complaining about my situation—I am on the ground floor, and do have a yard. It’s a blessing!
Hi, Diane – You’ve described the ‘complexity of feelings’ very well. Like you, I am incredibly grateful. I live in a beautiful area, with a husband who I adore. We are retired so are released from the worry of work and unemployment. We have a decent ’emergency kit’ and shopped ahead. We have stayed connected with family and friends through video conferencing, phone, email and messenger. Still, I woke up this morning knowing that I needed to make a plan. RIchard and I have close family members, in fragile health, who live hours away and do not have many others to rely on if there health was to slip further. I am off to begin that plan right now. Lots of complexities and challenges everywhere right now.
I’m so glad you are keeping in touch with your vulnerable family members! I’m sure they are grateful. Take care, and stay well, Donna!
Diane, I feel the solitary scene you so eloquently describe and I am grateful for my big house and neighborhood activity. It is a false sense of normalcy, but comforting nevertheless. I’ve wanted to downsize for years, but this experience has made me rethink that plan. Beautifully written, as always. Thank you.
Such compliments, Suzanne! Thanks. I do have a lovely secluded area in front of my condo. I’m actually the ‘chief gardener’ for this small space, so I feel privileged! But still, a house with room to wander around in would be better…
Scary times moving into the future. Listened to some TED Talks recently and heard that ‘new viruses’ will be common going forward because of the disruptions caused by climate change and deforestation.
My son, (science major), says the same. This is a warning, he says. We will need to be prepared. Thanks, Joe.
Hi Diane! Glad to hear you are staying healthy and staying busy….yes, my door knobs AND my phone are cleaner than they ever have been! I’ve been able to get outside and walk everyday but it is amazing how I still feel constrained and I’m obviously not used to it. The extrovert in my is finally jealous of introverts! Stay safe and stay healthy! ~Kathy
I’m actually an introvert. I don’t necessarily need to talk to people, but even we introverts enjoy a quick hello and a friendly wave. LOL
Your website looks mahvelous! Very clean and appealing. And yes re grateful for humans. I hope this sentiment carries over to employers when things get better.
My hope too. Sometimes, when people go through a period of adversity, they are more understanding of others…but sometimes they think, “I’ve been through so much, now it’s payback time!” How people react is a measure of their integrity and humanity. We never know which side of the coin will turn up. So we can only hope goodness will shine through. Thank you for your comment about the site. I like it too.
I like change… always have. so I LOVE the new cleaner clearer look of your blog!
it’s so fresh and somehow life-giving…. just as your writing is. it’s good. young feeling!
I think when this is over there will be amazing changes all around us. a new Humanity?
I don’t know. but I sure hope so! especially for families with children.
having pneumonia last year and other serious heart problems in the years before that…
and now COPD and AFIB… (good grief! what a ridiculous MESS I am) . . .
I have honestly thought many different times that I had finally breathed my last. LOL.
so I flat refuse to give into the fear that is this virus. even as bad as it is.
I hope not to sound frivolous or reckless (I do follow the rules.)
but I have decided… if it happens I will try to deal with it. and que sera sera. I’ve had a good run.
and like you… I’m also an introvert. and I’m retired. which probably makes it easier.
I am relaxing and taking it a day at a time! but then I don’t have a house full of children and meals to fix.
being retired is actually wonderful during times like this. and I sure don’t take it for granted! 🙂 xoxo
tammy j, it’s always refreshing to read your comments! I’m also saying que sera, sera—we don’t have any other options right now! I admire the way you are coping with your health challenges. What courage!
oh Diane! lol. thank you … but one person’s courage is another’s stupidity!
I remember my dad often being frustrated with me saying…
” Tam! do SOMETHING! even if you do it WRONG!” LOL.
I don’t like that as much as I have always loved the English advice…
“Keep Calm and Carry On.” isn’t that just totally lovely? I think so!!! XOXO
Yes, tammy j. The British had something there…
All the words, both yours and everyone else, speaks to me – I too at the bottom of the World in Lockdown (New Zealand) – I’ve a couple of food/getting helpers, I’m home alone and no wheels, doubly more difficult. One is at the forefront because she spoke up first. I had actually just bought one of my monthly online shop-ups before I fitted into the earlier level – but then I was and am still totally restricted on getting out for food.
So this morning my first order of commercially made meals arrived – and I’ve decided that I will increase the number because cooking/baking and so forth here for me now (not just now but before now) had got problematic with my hand issues. My main helper will still be needed as the meal doesn’t contain say a packet of flour or eggs or the dreaded TP (Have a bit of a supply from before)
Flour is still a lost commodity here, but helper got me something quite different a “cake box mix” – probably make it tomorrow, still looking for a suitable bake tin but did find my el.hand mixer gadget…
interesting times, certainly makes one appreciate what we did have, of the future do not know.
one of my art friends has a significant chalk board and she wrote this:
“Does anyone know if we can shower yet or just keep washing our hands? ” (with an added smiley face)
We’re all appreciating what we have, and possibly regretting what we have lost. Uncertainty takes a lot of getting used to, when we lived such predictable lives only a few short weeks ago. I am tying to sort out my shopping problems, as I’m sure everyone is doing. Take care, and stay well, cedar.
You have expressed very well what we are all thinking and feeling at present, apart from the few arrogant, selfish idiots who are carrying on as though nothing is happening. No doubt Karma will be visiting them soon.
I like the new look – it is very clear and easy on the eye. Just one small thing: that ‘information on the left’ is indeed very easy to see, but on my iPad it is on the right. Hardly a major issue, though!
Stay safe and well, Diane.
It’s hard to acknowledge that there are still some people who are stupidly refusing to accept the reality of this frightening epidemic. But they do exist (sigh). Not much we can do, except do our part. Yes, Karma—always there to balance things out!
The new look is fabulous. My compliments. Things here too are just like what you are experiencing there but, it has also brought a lot of old friends back into calling each other instead of sending whatsapp messages.
Yes, the human voice can be very reassuring. I find I am doing the same. I have an elderly sister in a residence in a neighboring province. Worried about her…and she feels very vulnerable right now.
Love the new look. We, like everyone else, are following the guidelines and coping. Scary times but hopefully, this too shall pass. One day at a time. 😁👍
Yes, one slow day after another…time passes, so does a pandemic. Blessings to all. Take care.
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